Vaderschapsverlof is een hot item. Vaderklap houdt zich zo vaak mogelijk afzijdig van politiek, maar dit onderwerp moesten we aansnijden. Zweden wordt gezien als het ideale land voor ouders. Is dit een fabeltje of niet?
We vroegen het aan Martin, vader van drie kinderen en man van Minimocks Petra. Omdat er bij een vertaling altijd wat info verloren gaat, geven we je hier integraal zijn antwoord in het Swenglish.
Het woord is aan Martin...
I think that we in Sweden is on the right way but still there´s a lot to do because there is still more mothers that are home with the kids than fathers. And the main reason to that is that the family looses money if the father is home so our society needs to work on how to eliminate the differences between men and women's salaries, at least when they do the same job. But that's another topic...
I have been home with my three kids and i think that it has made my bound to them much stronger. And i think it's strange that some men think that it's not their jobb to be home with the kids, it's only the mother's. Stone age thinking. Of course it's tough sometimes but it's as tough for the mothers.
All my friends that have children are home with them and is so for a long time, perfect when you have friends that are home the same time as yourself. And we also have open kindergarten for parents that are home, super.
- Die open kindergarten wat is dat juist?
Open kindergarten is a place where you can go when you are home with the kids. There is staff there but they don't take care of the kids as in a kindergarten. There are toys, you can warm your meal and talk to other parents etc. It's often the municipal thats behind the open kindergarten or the swedish church(nothing to do with the religion, they just have that kind of activity). It's free of charge but the church sometimes take a symbolic fee to buy material etc.
- En verder?
The good thing is that we have come so far that if the father is not home with the kids for at least 3-4 months people think that's bad. So the general opinion is that the father should be home for a long time.
With my first child Frank i was home for 4 months, Liv 7 months and Harry 7 months. And we still can use parental days that we haven't used until the age of 12, perfect when you want to make your summer holidays longer.
I´m home with Harry at the moment and i´m going back to my job in August. It's a perfect time of the year to be home with him when it's starts to get warm and you have all of the summer ahead.
Totally we get 480 days to be home with our children, 390 of them are based on our salary and 90 days are "low" and it's the same for everyone. 90 days of these 390 are locked for the mother and for the father, the father can't give them to the mother and vice verse so if he doesn't use them they burn in.
And that's the latest attempt from the politicians to get a more 50/50 in parental leave. Before that, they tried a bonus system that worked depending on how much you where equal you would get a bonus in cash, but it didn't work out as they wanted. The fathers didn't use as much days as they wanted.
Some employers like mine give an extra 10% when you're home so that the income gap doesn't hurt as much. Because it's a problem that your wallet isn't felling so good when you're home and that needs to be fixed if they want more fathers to be home.
I think that the majority of the mothers are happy that their men are home with the kids becuase they have first been pregnant for 9 months then breastfeeding for x months so i´m sure they feel happy that they can come back to their work.
But one thing that needs to change is that some mothers don't trust the men to be home with children and i think it's tough for some women to let go of the responsibility and also step aside and let the father take place and the fathers need to step up their game and show the mother that he can take control.
I hope you're satisfied and that you get the politicians to step up and give the fathers more time with the kids. It's good for you and your society
- Veel van onze lezers zijn zelfstandig, daarom vroegen we ook hoe het daarmee zat.
It's the same for a woman and a man that's self employed. Petra is self employed and you are not supposed to work when you are on parantal leave, if you do that you can be charged. But depending on how many days you get paid for being home you can work the other days. Say that you get parental leave money for mon-fre you can work with your business sat-sun etc.
Thx Thijs voor de voorzet.
Wat vinden jullie trouwens van het ouderschaps- en/of vaderverlof. Meer, minder, niet, wel, wie neemt het op? Shoot!